The Effin' CrunchCrew
Everyday life situations consisting of growing up in our days of youth to ghost , UFOs , crime and why is it so damn hot in Texas? I guess you can call this an adult radio show online (so we get away with a lil more) lol! Music is a big deal in our lives so if we can help by listening and maybe setting up an interview lets Go!!
The Effin' CrunchCrew
S3-Epi 61 TECC "The Boy Behind The Name : Jeremy From Pearl Jam"
-The Effin’ CrunchCrew — “Jeremy: The Boy Behind the Song”
Today on The Effin’ CrunchCrew, things get deep. Spook discovers that he and Jeremy — the boy behind Pearl Jam’s haunting anthem — actually went to school together. Same hallways, same yearbook, just six months before tragedy struck. But was the whole song really about Jeremy? We dig into the truth — and Eddie Vedder’s other inspiration for those lyrics.
Of course, this wouldn’t be The CrunchCrew without a little chaos. Pinkie gets accused of aiding and abetting two fugitives, Spook admits he might’ve been a snitch at 7 years old (“You didn’t see anything!” — “Shooottt yes I did!”), and we ask the real questions: Have any of the crew been traumatized? What do silent screams of depression sound like? And more importantly — who can help when nobody’s listening?
Help is available 988 Lifeline or 1-800-273-8255 (24/7)
Today on The Effin' Crunch Crew, it's story time. Now, I know I've been taking us for little rides here about people I went to high school with, some who got murdered, but this one takes the cake. I did not realize until just yesterday that I went to school with the boy behind the song, Jeremy. Yeah, we're talking about Pearl Jam. So, kick back, relax, and let's get into it. Coming up next on The Effin' Crunch Crew. Yeah.
Speaker 00:Coming to you live on the air. You better
Speaker 04:ask
Speaker 00:somebody.
Big Spook:Warning.
Pinkie:We recognize that the views and opinions expressed on the FN Crunch Crew show may be offensive to some listeners. Please accept this as our advance warning and apology. Now, stop being little bitches and let's get this Effin" show on the road. Take it away, Spook. You can't stop
Speaker 04:O Oh, yeah. It's your boy, Big Spook. Pinkie!
Speaker 04:And Loca Lisa. And we are. Oh, Pan Blanco's not here. He's gone.
Unknown:But we are.
Speaker 04:The Effin' CrunchCrew. So kick back, relax. How y'all all doing? Pinkie's in
Big Spook:the house. I'm COVID free. So this show is going to take off with kind of like me just being the narrator and then afterwards we will go into and discuss it and then we'll do our regular stuff. So we're going to pick up on it right about now. So y'all kick back and listen. January 8th, 1991. A cold morning in Richardson, Texas. At Richardson High School, students walked into their classrooms like any other day. But for 15-year-old Jeremy Wade Delle, this day would be his last. What happened in that classroom would not only shock his classmates, his teachers, and the entire Dallas area, but years later, it would echo across the world in one of the most haunting rock songs ever written. Jeremy Wade Delle was just a kid, a 15-year-old boy from Richardson, Texas, who, like so many other teenagers, struggled. Teachers described him as artistic, a quiet, sometimes troubled young man who had bounced between living with his mother and his father after their divorce. Court documents showed he had already been dealing with truancy issues, skipping classes, struggling to stay motivated, Some classmates said he seemed withdrawn. Others remember him as someone who wanted to fit in, but carried a heavy sadness. His story was the story of so many kids, a little lost, a little overlooked, carrying pain he couldn't always show. That morning, Jeremy showed up late to class. He had a pass in hand, but not from the office. Instead, he carried something far more devastating. In front of the classroom full of students, Jeremy pulled out a handgun, raised it, put it in his mouth, and pulled the trigger before anyone could stop him. The room was frozen, shocked, terrified. His classmates ran screaming into the hallways. His teacher, traumatized, would never be the same. It wasn't just another tragedy in Dallas. It was a moment that would travel far beyond Richardson High. Now, here's where the story took a turn into music history. Across the country in Seattle, a rising band called Pearl Jam had just started making waves. Their lead singer, Eddie Vedder, was reading the morning paper and came across Jeremy's story. The headline, the details, the haunting reality of a young boy who felt invisible. It stuck with him. Vedder later said, I remember reading about it and being struck by how it said he tried to speak, but no one was really listening. And that's when he decided to speak the loudest way possible. And out of that, the song Jeremy was born. With its chilling chorus, Jeremy spoke in class today. Eddie Vedder turned a local Dallas tragedy into a worldwide anthem about youth despair, alienation, and the dangers of silence. When Pearl Jam released Jeremy in 1992, It hit hard. The music video, with its disturbing imagery of a boy standing before his classmates, became iconic. But here's the thing. Many who saw it didn't know the real Jeremy. They didn't know Jeremy Wade Dell, the teenager from Richardson who loved art, who was trying to find his place in a world that didn't seem to make space for him. His classmates carried that day with them forever. For them, it wasn't just a song. It was real. And to this day, Richardson High School remembers. Jeremy's story became bigger than Dallas, bigger than Texas. It became a warning and a reminder about what happens when we don't hear the voices of our young, the hurting and the invisible. So next time you hear that haunting Pearl Jam track, think of Jeremy Wade Delle. Think of the boy from Richardson, Texas, and the echo of his final words that still ripple through speakers more than 30 years later. Jeremy spoke in class today. So first off, what'd y'all think about that?
Pinkie:I never knew. I think you and I were talking about this earlier. I never knew that I knew what he was, who he was talking about, but I didn't know he was from Richardson.
Big Spook:Yeah. And I found out so much going into this because as I was doing research on it, I heard the song like last week and I'm like, man, that was a badass song. And I remember it took place in Richardson. And what's funny is my kids went to school there. Their mom went to school there, you know, and I looked at it was 1991 whenever he took his life but I started looking into it deeper and I remember seeing the picture that would come up with it and I said that kid looks so familiar right and I looked at the picture and I'm like I know the kids around him in the picture like I remember them because but they were at my school they were at my high school and I said there's no way so I looked it up and I said well before he killed himself at Richardson High School did he go to any other high school? To my shock, I went to school with him.
Pinkie:That's crazy.
LOCA LISA:Was it like he went to your school freshman year and then moved to Richardson the year after?
Big Spook:Yes, so his parents got divorced while he was at Bryan Adams High School. They split up, so he ended up staying with his dad. His dad lived in Richardson area. He went to school there and he was a freshman I was a sophomore. And I remember vividly because I have the yearbook, right? So I came home and I opened up the yearbook and he was in there. And it was the picture that I've seen always because in freshman year, our cousin Junior was a freshman during this time at BA, at Brown Adams too. So I remember looking at it and I had to walk out of my office because I'm like, that is so close to home to have a song so iconic be that close, right? I thought me living in Richardson was close enough. You know what I'm saying? And then I thought, well, my kids went there and their mom went there. That was close enough. But to even be that much closer to what's like almost a full circle for me that we went to school together. We were in the same we're in the same freaking, you know, yearbook. And I'm like, holy crap.
LOCA LISA:Yeah, I thought it happened at, you know, where he went to where he went to freshman because I was like, oh, my gosh. So right now, when we talked about it before we started recording, when you told me that it it wasn't and that it was in Richardson I was like oh man this whole time I thought it was
Big Spook:you thought it was Bryan Adams yeah I thought it was Bryan Adams yeah I I knew it was Richardson after the fact because I remember back in the day I was like okay where did this kid kill himself and stuff like that gets me like if we hear a song and somebody tells me oh man that happened in like Wichita I'm like what what way what part of Wichita I've been there before you know well I wanted to know and then to find out it happened here you know in the city that I live in it was just crazy um But then it went deeper because I went to school together. I went to Bryan Adams in Dallas. That's where I went to. And when I saw that, I was just blown away. But it went even deeper than that because I talked to a friend of mine and I didn't know he had siblings. And I talked to this friend today and I was like, my friend was telling me, I said, hey, we're doing a podcast show about Jeremy, the song that Pearl Jam wrote. And she was like, Joe, his sister was one of my best friends. I was like, what? Like, what the fuck? I didn't know he had a sister. Was she older? She was older, yeah. She was older. And I was like, okay. And sure enough, man, I was looking at her and she sent me a picture to see her. And I was like, okay. I said, I don't think I remember her. Like, I don't remember her. Maybe. And then she sent me a picture to see. But anyways, beyond that, I was like, wow, this is deep. So I started looking at Eddie Vedder. Like, what made made him write about this song because the kid, Jeremy, was very artistic. I don't know how he was in BA. Could it happen there? Was he that depressed? A lot had to do with his parents being divorced and split. That affects kids a lot, especially at that age. At that teenage, 15 years old, you think it's your fault or something happened, and I hate that. But at the same time, I'm thinking to myself, it happened here and it says he couldn't get along with people here. He didn't have a place to fit when he transferred to BA. And he transferred at the time where he was going to be a sophomore, right? So whenever he started school in Richardson, he became a sophomore. And he was only there for like six months, I want to say. But he came in and he started rebelling against everything his home he saw counselors with his dad because he was getting in trouble at school and so they set up counselors to meet with him and his father and I'm not sure if his mom did anything but it talked about that and that he just felt alone he became friends with this one girl at Richardson High School that she talks about it in one of the interviews I saw and he was basically it was like whenever you go to school and you get in trouble, you go to detention or whatever it is. So he was in detention a lot, and so was she. And they would write each other notes, and on the note, he would say, write back. And she would get it, read it, and she would
Pinkie:write back. We used to do that, I remember. We used to do that, and then W, and then the WB. Yeah, yeah, so to write back.
Big Spook:So he said, he would say, write back, write back, and it happened to go on a lot. She said the last time she got one from him, he put something like, I don't know if this is, don't quote me on this, see you on the other side or see you. So he had already had in his head that something was going to happen, right? And she thought that was weird because that was the last message she got from him on paper.
Pinkie:Can I read this, what I just found about that? I guess it's about that. It says, Jeremy Wade Delle was a quiet student known for his sadness. After arriving late to class, he was sent to the principal's office to fill out a tardy slip. He returned to the classroom with a .35 357 Magnum Revolver, I don't know how you say that. Yeah, yeah, 357. Stated, Miss, I got what I really went for. Put the gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger before anyone could react. Yeah,
Big Spook:yeah.
Pinkie:That is so freaking sad. I was going to
Big Spook:tell you that because the teacher, when he walked in, it was an English class. And the teacher's name started with an F. I forgot her whole name. But yeah, he did say that. And that was also said on another thing that I heard. So the same words that you just said is what he said to the teacher. He had been in trouble. He'd always be late for this English class, and that particular day he went out, got his gun, came back in. Where he got the gun, they still don't know, which is weird.
LOCA LISA:So a student... Meaning it wasn't missing from his parents?
Big Spook:Yeah, they couldn't figure... I don't know if they figured it out now, but from what I saw research, they didn't tell me anything. I didn't learn anything. What I did know was the people who witnessed it Witnessed by this meaning the people who sat in this classroom but the people outside the classroom who were in the hallways there was one kid and he said that he was getting into his locker and he was working his combination and he heard something and he said he thought it was like a heavy book that slammed to the ground and come to find out it was a gun going off. He said he thought it was a book until a girl ran out of that classroom yelling a blonde girl ran out she was yelling and crying, and then he peeked in and he saw Jeremy's body on the ground, gun next to him, and blood everywhere. And then he saw students holding up the teacher because the teacher was in shock, like she almost fainted. And I was like, whoa. And then to go even further than that, I met somebody who was actually in the class when that happened, right, as a student. And I never talked to them about it because I really don't know them that well but to find out that they were in the class at that time was kind of like creepy
LOCA LISA:as hell yeah what was that experience like I know in the video there's like kids with their like shocked face and like blood splatter on their face and they're all wearing white that's exactly what he was talking about earlier
Big Spook:they're all wearing white and shit and so the director of the video had put it together to you know they read up on everything so the song itself I gotta get to that point Eddie Vedder wrote the song but he he never knew Jeremy. But one of the sentences he says, clearly I remember picking on the boy. Okay, but how do you do that? So he, in an interview, said that the song was about Jeremy and another boy named Brian. Brian went to school with him when he was in high school. And he would always get into a fight with this kid. And this kid had a similarity that Jeremy had. He brought a gun to school, but he brought it to shoot up the place. Oh, dang. So he didn't shoot nobody. He didn't hit nobody, but he did get in trouble for it. So he would always pick on this kid. They'd fight, and this kid actually hit him in the face with his left hook or whatever. It was just something that he threw in the song. But I was like, damn. Okay, so he put these together, and the video itself was they wore white. They were in the classroom, and they all pointed at Jeremy.
LOCA LISA:Yeah, they were all almost like, huh? Yeah,
Big Spook:laughing at him. Look at you. And so people who watched this video at first thought it was about a kid who went into a classroom and shot the students. Because you notice on their faces, they just paused like they're dead. They actually have the blood splatter from him shooting himself. And people didn't realize that at first. And I was like, damn, that's pretty crazy. So they talk about him painting in his video like he's got a vivid vivid mindset of colors like he talks about the sun being orange and yellows and these v-shaped hands up in the air and i saw an actual painting that that uh Jeremy did and it was beautiful he's 15 year old he had great talent it was a painting of this elephant and the elephant looks so real i was like man that is awesome this kid had really good talent
Pinkie:i read that he had won an award at the state fair
Big Spook:oh he did i didn't read that part That's how good he was. He was a really, really talented kid, man. I was like, dude, for him to go through whatever he was going through and take it out on himself like that, that's horrible. But I remember looking at it. And so I asked my son, I said, hey, do you remember that song? It's way before your time. And he's like, oh, yeah. He goes, that classroom was next door to a classroom that I used to go to. And it's still there. So during the shooting this is fucking weird nobody got sent home they continued school
LOCA LISA:that's crazy
Big Spook:like nowadays you fucking find a gun you're gone right no they continued school you could go home if your parents came to pick you up but they continued it and they had a bunch of counselors come in to help counsel the kids I won't give a fuck I'm leaving I don't want to be there how
Pinkie:could you in a room full of blood or if you find out if your son calls you and is like oh my god this kid just blew his his head off in the class
Big Spook:yeah
LOCA LISA:you're gonna be like I'm about to pick you up
Big Spook:well remember there was no phones back then like kids can afford phones back then yeah that's true we had brick phones and shit back then if you had one you
LOCA LISA:know so imagine imagine if your son comes home at the end of the day like a four o'clock and he's like guess what happened at 8 30 yeah and you're like what the school didn't even it
Big Spook:was nine something
LOCA LISA:yeah yeah like you're like dang you they didn't let us know or they didn't notify the parents they didn't let anybody go home oh they're
Big Spook:being some deep shit nowadays yeah like uh you You should have called me. Like, what the fuck's wrong with y'all? So yeah, they kept the school open, which I found very fucking weird. Like, why would you do that? Especially after a shooting and somebody, I don't know. That was kind of weird to me to find that out. But yeah, so he wrote this song about him. And then as I was reading more about it, the kid who played him in the video actually died too.
LOCA LISA:What?
Pinkie:Yeah. He died at a later age. That was his only thing he was ever on. He was on nothing else. No movies, no other video. That was the only video. They only got him because he looked like him a little bit, not much, after I saw the pictures. But yeah, so he went. They won awards for it, MTV Awards or whatever. And the kid ended up dying at... He wasn't a kid when he died. He was like 30-something years old. But he died of a weird-ass accident. And I was like, that's fucked up. But I thought that was crazy that that shit all happened and I was like damn dude this was too close to home for me it's like and it still shocks me that number one it's full circle now like this song has made it the whole world around everybody knows this beat this song like Jeremy spoke in class everybody knows those words and I was like dude that's that's freaking crazy I mean Pinkie said she remembers hearing it like when you but I was so young I mean when it happened I was 11 but then I was reading throughout I guess the video didn't actually that's probably why I said it was like 93 for me because the video that's when the video was recognized
Big Spook:yeah because 92 was the album they had that was their that was their debut album was 10 was the name of the album and that was one of the top three songs on their album of all time and I was like damn so 91 You were just 11? 11. Fuck, I was already out of school.
Pinkie:Were you really? No.
Big Spook:I was... I want to say I was supposed to graduate in 90, 91. Yeah.
Pinkie:Damn, you old. Oh, really? Just kidding. No, I'm kidding. Yeah, 91. So, 93 by the time the video came out.
Big Spook:It's crazy because I was driving with... I was driving with Jojo and his girlfriend and I said, why are you so quiet? I was telling them the story about it and... She was like, man, you got a lot of connections. I said, what do you mean? She goes, well, you do. You can look at this story you're talking about. You're connected to it in a certain way. And then the story you told about, we talked about last time when you weren't here, you were sick. We were talking about the Blockbuster murders. That was a connection for actually Lisa and me because our cousin was supposed to work that night at that Blockbuster, which he would have been dead a lot sooner than what he is now. He's passed for a couple years now but yeah he that night I remember that guy who went in and killed them he killed one of the guys I went to school with too so it's like it's weird it's
LOCA LISA:all in the hood
Big Spook:all in the hood everything leads back to Texas yeah I want you to do that this one guy one time told me this one of my friends actually he came to an interview with us Ducato Vega he always told me when we were younger he'd be like you know everything leads to Texas he's from the Louisiana I said what do you mean he goes just watch from now on and see what at least happens you know anything news anything that happens serial killers whether it's something that's happening with the war whatever it leads back to Texas and everything leads back to Texas I thought that was crazy yeah you missed it man I would love to hear what you had to say today sucker talking about he working working
LOCA LISA:I think he's at home asleep
Big Spook:he's out there playing with Gus Gus and feeding coyotes
LOCA LISA:I think he had I think he had too hard Hot dogs for dinner.
Big Spook:Oh, damn. He probably did. Hot
Pinkie:dogs. Him
LOCA LISA:and his dogs. Snuggled up with the dogs.
Big Spook:With Gus Gus. Stupid ass Gus.
Pinkie:I thought about him for Bella's birthday. She had a pool party and we served hot dogs.
Big Spook:Oh, hell. Yeah, no, that's his favorite food of all time. I understand that, boy.
Pinkie:But they were the Costco hot dogs, so you know those are better.
Big Spook:The Costco? Yeah. I mean, Sam's and Costco to me have the same dogs. They're the same. prices, man. So it's like $1.50. It's $1.38 at Sam's. Really? For the hot dog? For
Speaker 04:the drink
Pinkie:and the fucking hot dog. Oh, okay. Well, it's $1.50 at
Big Spook:Costco. Have you had their pizza? Do they serve pizza at Costco? They do. Yeah. Holy shit, they're good. So Sam's has a badass pizza. I'm like, dude, I could buy a whole large pizza and bring it home, which I've done before. And it's good. Like, it's really, there's nothing bad about it. Everything's good about it. I'm like, damn, it's really
Pinkie:good. I always tell Bella, I'm like, we should go. I I don't have one that close to me. I mean, it's like 15 minutes for me, 15, 20. But if it was closer, I'd probably be eating there regularly. Just go in, get some food. Get what you need and walk out.
LOCA LISA:I like it when they have them on the outside where you don't actually have to go in. They
Big Spook:have them on the
LOCA LISA:outside? Yeah, almost like a walk-up window. Is
Big Spook:this Costco though? Yeah. Oh, so you
Pinkie:have to go in. I
Big Spook:want a Costco. Excuse me, I want a Costco card. I want to go check it out because we've been going to Sam's forever. And I told Angela, I said, you get a Costco card, I have the Sam's card. Yeah. And let's just go back and forth, you know, whatever we want to do. Because I think Costco has things that Sam's doesn't. Yeah, they do that. They sell liquor at Costco?
LOCA LISA:No, they sell wine. I could have
Big Spook:swore somebody told me they sell liquor there and I don't think they do it at Sam's, but they do sell wine and beers at Sam's. I know that much. Look how we jumped 80 years. Went from suicide to Well,
Speaker 01:y'all said hot dogs, and we kind of went off on
Speaker 04:that. We said Blanco. That's all I needed.
Speaker 01:If he didn't have hot dogs. Oh, my
Speaker 04:God. Okay, let me go back to the story. So if anybody out there has anything like stories, or I know a lot of people who went to BA, and if you knew about this, him going to school with us, and if you didn't know about it, I'd like to hear y'all's comment, or if you had a class with him, or if you remember anything about him, even from Richardson High school hit us
Speaker 01:up on did you hear about it
Speaker 04:yeah what did you hear about it were you in the classroom like the person that i i know which was crazy but um yeah i couldn't only imagine what it would be like if i was in that classroom like would i be more fucked up than i am now
Speaker 02:i guess i really didn't experience much
Speaker 04:that's i mean you realize that like if you were in a classroom and some shit like this happened how are you as an adult today
Speaker 02:yeah
Speaker 04:like i don't know i mean what's the most what's most weirdest or mind blowing thing happened to you
Speaker 02:and how did it affect you
Speaker 04:yeah did it affect you you how about you have you had anything happen to you like anything it don't have to be like a shooting or like somebody bust their knee open or fucking twist an ankle really bad I
Speaker 02:mean my parents fought in a restaurant
Speaker 04:was that when all our aunts were in there
Speaker 02:all the family was up in the circle girl that
Speaker 04:was a that was a family of right there
Speaker 02:that could man that could have been on a episode of something
Speaker 04:that shit right there I would have had his own show like literally would have had his own fucking show Pinky do you remember anything that tragically happened and did it affect you in any way as a youngster
Speaker 01:as a youngster no
Speaker 04:no
Speaker 01:I'm trying to
Speaker 04:think what is the what is the most weirdest so in high school what happened
Speaker 01:well I mean I know that there were oh my god we were like freaking seven eight years old My parents were out of the house. Nobody died or anything like that. But the police were after this couple. And somehow me and my siblings allowed these people to come and hide in our home while my parents were away. I don't even know what brought this up just now. I guess your question. But the police was all in our house. My parents got home. They're like, what the hell is going on? And we're like, we don't know. And the couple was pushing on the door. so the cops wouldn't come in
Speaker 04:yeah
Speaker 01:and we're just like we didn't know what the hell we just were letting I honestly don't remember
Speaker 04:how long were you in prison is what I need to
Speaker 01:know like what the
Speaker 04:fuck like that's
Speaker 01:some like well if you must know I was in there for a year what was they calling it a bank I'm kidding I was never in prison
Speaker 04:holy shit isn't that crazy that's nuts like I've had some shit happen when I was a kid okay so one thing that happened when I was a kid was I lived with my we lived with a okay let me back it up lisa's mom was the youngest of the sisters right and uncle peter was the youngest well he was second youngest oh no he was the baby wasn't he
Speaker 02:he is the baby he's
Speaker 04:the baby yeah so i remember all of us live with grandma and grandpa on gaston avenue and down in dallas
Speaker 02:all of who
Speaker 04:like it was your mom it was uncle peter it was my mom myself uh I want to say Aunt Lucy, maybe not.
Speaker 02:Josie, probably.
Speaker 04:Josie was already off with Domingo. I think my mom had already gotten divorced. So we're living with grandma and grandpa.
Speaker 02:Okay.
Speaker 04:Okay. So this house, the next door neighbor was this old black man. And it kind of reminds me of Sanford's son, like this guy. He would dress that way and he'd always come outside. Grandpa would say hi to him and they, you know, just a little short talk. One day, I'm there at home and I'm on the front porch and our front porch didn't have a screen but it was big enough for us you know it was a nice old house I don't know if it's still there or not but anyways I remember looking next door and the old man wasn't there and I want to say he used to go collect junk like metal shit and sell it well I remember these two guys and this had to be the 70s late 70s because I remember they had this long fluffy hair and they were white guys one of them had Had a mustache with not even a whole goatee. It was a goatee, but no beard. And then the other guy, they were both wearing blue jean jackets and blue jeans. And they were walking around his house. And I was like, what the fuck these guys doing? This is weird. I was a kid. I didn't know what the fuck was happening. Well, I'm up there watching and I see them coming back and forth taking stuff to their car. I had to be like eight years old, maybe. Eight or nine. And I'm looking and the police come over And the man from next door comes, he gets home and he's like, he just got robbed. There's something happening. He didn't want to know if anybody saw anything. And mom and all them, I don't know, nobody saw anything. And, you know, grandpa was like, no, I was at work, nobody saw anything. And they don't want you, if you saw something, you didn't see nothing. You know what I'm saying? It's that type of shit. I said, out of the blue, I peeked my head and I said, I saw, I saw two white men. Man, my mom pushed me back in and she didn't see nothing. I said, no, I did and they said we need to talk to him
Speaker 03:and
Speaker 04:I remember them coming and pulling me out and my mom was like freaking out and everybody was like listening to me through the door and my mom was standing out there and I think grandpa was out there and I told them what they looked like and who they were but I remember one of the guys with the mustache he turned and looked at me I guess he didn't think twice well that kid ain't gonna fucking remember me he's a fucking kid I remembered to the T found out like maybe a couple days later they caught them it was a father and son duo who would go and break into people's houses and take shit so that started me off as thinking as a young kid damn I just saw a robbery you know what I'm saying this is a robbery that just happened in front of the house in the 70s and I'm looking at this shit and they're walking around carrying things out from my next door neighbor did it traumatize me no but it made me think of shit different it made me think of okay not everybody's nice them white guys they bad they
Speaker 02:bad as hell especially if they have a long mustache with no
Speaker 04:beard no beard mustache he had like I call them motorcycle handlebars something like that that's what
Speaker 03:it looked like
Speaker 04:I was like this fucker hair man so I remember that happening and then when I got inside they were like you can't be doing that the only thing that traumatized me at that house was I got up one night to get some water and I was a kid I went to the kitchen and I remember there was this orange fucking chair an old ass 70s orange chair it was by the telephone and I went and got water and I screamed and yelled like a little bitch because there was a fucking rat as big as like as big as a man's shoe and I was a kid and that bitch ran around me on the wall and ran underneath my legs and I screamed and yelled and here comes grandma running in you know with her nightgown and grandpa gets up blah blah blah and I said and she goes matala you got to kill those damn we'll kill it so i remember that we had these big rats and they fucking it traumatized me to the point when i was older and i found a fucking mouse in my house i was like fuck it brought me back to life when i was a kid that's the only thing that traumatized me so i can only imagine being there and seeing somebody go up to the front of the room and shoot themselves
Speaker 03:yeah
Speaker 04:as a kid as an adult as an adult i've seen a lot of shit and it's kind of it kind of numbed that for me like seeing stuff like that like uh shootouts i i was in a shootout where i heard bullets going by my ears i was i was i've seen people get shot i've seen and and the first time you see somebody get shot you're like oh fuck he got he got shot like what the hell and it's not a tv thing it's an actual thing and it doesn't happen like tv they get shot they yell and they're like ow that burns it's not like uh and they fall they fucking shoot and they're running and and running, and then they fall. They don't realize it. They don't realize what happened, right? Oh, that's something stunning. Like, you saw something bit me.
Speaker 02:Exactly. Everybody laughed at him, but that's probably really what it's like.
Speaker 04:That shit felt just like a bee sting or something. And the closest I got was skinned, and that shit burned. And it was on my pinky. And if it would have been like a centimeter over it, I probably would have lost a pinky.
Speaker 02:You would have had a pin. You would have had a
Speaker 03:pin instead of a pinky.
Speaker 04:hell yeah little nub and shit oh mc nub that would have been my name but that that shit would and if i was and i was a kid whenever i would see shoot a stupid gang shit that i went through when i was younger but did it traumatize me as much as it would have did when i was in high school like sitting there see somebody come in and shoot themselves i don't know i don't know i think it's more of a mindset of i hate to say this but how soft your mind is like what have you seen in like
Speaker 02:I think maybe the children of those kids probably suffered you know like of the parents were probably no like yeah of the kids that were in the classroom when they grew up and had children they were probably way overprotective
Speaker 03:yeah
Speaker 02:and imagine imagine like being a teenager and being like man I can't do nothing or my parents homeschool me because when they were in school some kid blew his head off in class.
Speaker 01:Imagine the teacher, because she sent him off to the principal's office.
Speaker 04:And they said she's never been the same.
Speaker 01:I bet. I forgot
Speaker 04:her name. You said it again.
Speaker 01:It was Faye. I was like, man. So he ended up getting the gun from the dad's female friend.
Speaker 04:So they did find out who he got
Speaker 01:the gun
Speaker 04:from. Oh, so he had a female friend already.
Speaker 01:And he had written notes to a couple of friends. I heard that he wrote something, but I didn't know that. Yeah, and he had sent cassettes. Basically, he was saying, I don't hate myself. I just hate the situation I'm in, like with my parents. I moved to a new school. I don't have any friends. I feel like I don't fit in is what it was.
Speaker 04:Yeah. See, I don't know. I didn't know him in Bryan Adams. But I know... He
Speaker 01:had been in a psychiatric hospital, too. I know he had. Oh, he did. See,
Speaker 04:I didn't know him. But when I saw his face, I knew I've seen him.
Speaker 03:Yeah.
Speaker 04:And when I saw the faces around him... I knew that wasn't Richardson. I was like, that's fucking where I went to school. Like those people I saw in my school. And, and to say that, did, did I ever rub elbows with him? Did I ever pick on him? No, I didn't pick on people like me and Angela talked about this. I used to take up for people. Like I was, I was always like, I did football and I did all that. And then I did the gang thing. Right. Stupidity. But I wouldn't let nobody pick on anybody like that. Like my cousin was gay and I couldn't stand it. If you picked on my cousin, that's my cousin. You don't do that. You just let him be. He loves who he loves. He wants to be who he wants to be. Is it affecting you? No. Then leave it be. You know what I'm saying? We only got one life on this earth and if you want to live it the way you want to live it to be happy, be happy. You know what I'm saying? And a lot of people can't take that. And I can honestly say I never picked on this boy. I never did anything wrong to this boy. I do remember him after I saw his picture. And it's vaguely remembering him. And it was amazing how I could put that together after seeing it online, his picture, and being like, I know that face. And it threw me for a loop. I'm like, this is crazy, man.
Speaker 01:People described him as just being a very sad boy and they wish that they would have befriended him. Yeah, I
Speaker 04:could see that. I guess anybody would say that, if I would have known. You know what
Speaker 01:I'm saying? Yeah, but you don't. That's the thing. People don't pick up on those cues.
Speaker 04:And I saw this today, as a matter of fact, as a online it was saying be nice to people because you don't know what they've been through today or you don't know what they're going through you know what I'm saying and I could be an asshole I really can and I could be stupid and be pissed off if somebody cuts me off I'm like shoot the finger off bitch but in my mind that's just stupidity at that time because it aggravated me but how do I know he just didn't lose somebody or she didn't lose somebody or you know their dog passed away or they just lost their job you know what I'm saying we don't think that way we think fast fast fast go go go in this society and for that kid who was a kid when I was a kid like he was 15 I had to be about 16 I had to be 16 years old at least I was a sophomore and to have him that close and find out that this song was written about him and it was somebody who was right there in my vicinity like what do they call that whenever you're 5 people away from uh knowing whatever his name was um
Speaker 01:you go into this mode of what what could i have done
Speaker 04:yeah like
Speaker 01:what how could i have affected anything changed that yeah
Speaker 04:and you really can't because i don't think that's that's the way it's supposed to be planned out to be so i didn't know that he left i knew he left a note but i didn't know he left tapes and notes yeah that's uh interesting because and then it was more about his situation with his family and he probably wasn't more happier at Bryan Adams he probably who knows he would have did it there we don't
Speaker 01:know yeah I mean it had to have been more so much more if he was in a in a psych hospital yeah well maybe it was from the same thing like where he because that wasn't that wasn't his first time that he had that he had said that he wanted to commit that he wanted to commit suicide
Speaker 04:and we've been well I say we've been through that I've been through that with my my daughter and And then, you know, a couple of people in my family and I was like, man, it's not easy because you feel like there's nothing you can possibly do. That is the worst feeling you could be as a parent and not being able to be that hero, that person who can just make it all better. You can't just hug them and say it's going to be you can do that, but it's not going to do anything. You know, and it's it takes it takes that person to have the power, but it takes you to give that power to be that back that that You got to be that backbone.
Speaker 01:Yeah. And I think the worst part about that is, is even when you do seek help, like I know someone that was kind of, that was close to me ended up going to one of those places because this person also, you know, had wanted to commit suicide or was cutting, they were cutting themselves. Oh yeah. And one of the, one of the things that was mentioned, um, was that they would manhandle them inside. So can you just imagine you're already going through all of
Speaker 04:this
Speaker 01:and And then, yeah. So, I mean, that could have been something else that he had to deal with. I mean, you just don't know. I believe
Speaker 04:that. I really believe that. You see stories about that, right? Or you see shows. Even Happy Gilmore had that one guy who treated his grandmother like shit when she was locked up and, you know, with the old folks
Speaker 01:on. Oh, my God, yes. You know what I'm talking
Speaker 04:about? Yes. And that's just... That's a playful way, but it really happens to the point of who's taking care of the people that you love? You know what I'm saying? Whenever they're locked up. And if... So, yeah, whenever my daughter went away and got help and came back and she had a lot of searching to do and she found herself and I'm happy and I'm happy that I'm happy that I'm still here to talk to her because at one time I didn't care if I was locked up the rest of my life to do something to somebody who had hurt her. And after being talked down from somebody, my friend who actually did time, I said, bro, 10, 15, years ago we could handle this he goes but your he goes your kids need you outside they don't need you inside
Speaker 01:yeah because you can't do anything from behind bars
Speaker 04:and that that really made me think that right there stopped me from even thinking about it and just focusing on her and and that's something that some a lot of these kids don't have so at the end of the at the end of the little document well the narration I did it was like you know we don't pay attention to the low voices of these kids or Or adults, too. We don't hear their silent yells. And I wrote a song about our ex-guitarist. He was our guitarist until he killed himself. And I wrote a song after a couple of months, and I call it Scream. And in my mind, I'm thinking, in his mind, being him, what is it like to do that? Like, I put myself in a situation of all that you're going through, all the things that running through your mind can anybody hear me scream or is it just me in my own head yelling like and I wonder if that's how it is or some of these people and they're so tired of screaming in their own head nobody helping them that they just say heck with it I don't know man it's it's uh it sucks and I'm I wanted to touch on this song because I I mean this this this person because I didn't realize how close it was to home even that we live in the same town or the same or where he used to live in. It went deeper than that.
Speaker 01:Or that you knew anyone that was close to him.
Speaker 04:Yeah, I mean, it's crazy. So, okay, here's what I'm going to do. If you know anybody who needs any help and you're thinking suicide, there's people out there that can help you. Help is available. You can pick up your phone and dial 988-SUICIDE-IN-CRISIS-LIFELINE and they'll help you. They're available 24 hours a day. They speak English, Spanish, and you can text 988. You can call 988. Hell, you can even chat. But get help. It's out there. And I'm glad the guy wrote it. Do y'all think writing this song and getting as popular as they got from this song, like there's more songs they got popular from, but this is one of the ones. You think that was in a bad way or did it need to
Speaker 01:be thrown out? I mean, this could have been something that he read the story and he's like shit this is how I felt before so he felt compelled to write it yeah it could have been a situation he probably didn't speak it but he probably had those same feelings and felt that he had he was a voice for that person
Speaker 04:there's a lot of musicians who go through a
Speaker 01:lot of the artists
Speaker 04:a lot of artists period like painters
Speaker 02:I mean Kurt Cobain
Speaker 04:oh yeah
Speaker 02:I don't see any negative from
Speaker 04:the
Speaker 02:song if anything it just brought more awareness
Speaker 04:I think it brought more more awareness. I didn't see anything bad about it. I think it, I think it got bigger than what they thought it was going to get. Like that song is just known. It's a great, it's great. It's put together. Great. And the words that come out after, you know, the story, and then you find out that it's actually based on some true events.
Speaker 01:I knew this song before I even knew anything like really like,
Speaker 04:yeah, me too.
Speaker 01:The story, the true story. Yeah.
Speaker 04:I knew the song. And then, then I heard, Oh, it's, it's about a kid who actually killed himself. And I'm like, no shit and then it's like yeah he killed himself in the Dallas area I'm like what the fuck you know I don't know it's just it really got me and I wanted to talk about it and it was supposed to be our second show but I decided we'd put it first because I've been really I stayed up late putting this stuff together
Speaker 01:last night you were eager to get it out I was
Speaker 04:so eager to get it out and then everything that I found out yesterday about me going to school with this kid I was like man
Speaker 01:even more
Speaker 04:yeah it's crazy I needed to get it out and to our listeners I know this isn't a normal one we usually cut up and you know X stupid do our thing but this is something I wanted to touch on and maybe it helps some people out there who going through it or who didn't know anything about Jeremy
Speaker 03:the
Speaker 04:song like there's a lot of young listeners out there too who maybe didn't know the real story yeah so yeah once again 988 is lifeline if you need any help or you have any suicidal thoughts. There's people out there and they can help you 24 hours a day. English or Spanish. Speaking other languages, I'm pretty sure they can help you the same way. So, on that note, live long and prosper.
Speaker 01:Because you never know where the force may take you. Peace. Bye. Disclaimer.
Speaker 02:Some of these facts have not been shared. These are just
Speaker 04:our opinions. Please don't come to our show for actual news. For help on suicide prevention or if you need somebody to talk to, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline number, 1-800-273-8255. Or you can call the three-digit number it was converted to, 988. There's always somebody to talk to.
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